The admissions folks read scores of essays on "significant events" in which the writer describes a winning touchdown, a brilliant moment of leadership, a perfectly executed solo, or the happiness brought to the less-fortunate by an act of charity. At the heart of Drew's essay is a failure -- he acted in a way that did not live up to his personal ideals.
His approach carries with it a little risk, but it is also a refreshing change from all the essays about how great the writer is.
Most applicants think they have to make themselves look super-human or infallible in their essays.
It also presents his strengths -- he is passionate about mechanical engineering and has been for most of his life.
The essay succeeds in showing off his strengths at the very time it examines his weaknesses.
I want our troops to have the best equipment they can, but I also believe that our possession of the best military equipment makes us more likely to go to war.
Military technology continues to grow more lethal, and technological developments create a never-ending cycle of military escalation. To this day I still weigh the ethical dilemma of my summer work.The significant experience topic on the Common Application raises unique issues that are discussed in these 5 writing tips.Like all college admissions essays, however, essays for Common Application option #1 must accomplish a specific task: they must be written clearly and tightly, and they must provide evidence that the writer has the intellectual curiosity, open-mindedness and the strength of character necessary to be a contributing and successful member of the campus community. Also, the title captures a key element of Drew's essay—Drew is not writing about a great success he had, but a personal failure.Were I to not do the job, the vehicle components would still be produced.Also, the parts I was making were for support vehicles, not assault weaponry.I’m convinced that even the most innocent involvement in the science of war makes one complicit in war itself. Were I true to my ideals, I really should have walked away and spent the summer mowing lawns or bagging groceries. They made valid points about the value of the experience and the ways that it would lead to bigger opportunities in the future. My summer job made me recognize that the military is a big employer of engineers, whether directly or indirectly.In the end I kept the job, partly from my parents’ advice and partly from my own desire to be doing real engineering work. I didn’t want to let a professional opportunity slip away. Undoubtedly I’ll be confronting similar yet more serious ethical decisions in the future.You can learn a lot about me from a quick glance in my closet.You’ll find no clothes, but shelves filled with motorized Lego kits, Erector sets, model rockets, remote control race cars, and boxes full of motors, wires, batteries, propellers, soldering irons and hand tools. No one was surprised when I decided to apply to college for mechanical engineering.Within hours of beginning my new job, I learned that my father’s friend was a subcontractor for the military.The components I’d be making would be used in military vehicles.
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